11) Melodrama

“How’s it going, Fabby?” Nestingwave’s voice was tense as he spoke over the communicator. He had come up with a bit of theater and wanted to contact Ambassador Lance as soon as possible but needed to check on Fabby’s progress first.”You know, Wave,” Fabby replied, “this is going much faster than I ever expected. In thirty zerons or so, I’ll have this whole power supply problem solved. Then we must decide what to do with our captive astral roach.”

“Don’t worry about it Fabby. I’ve got a plan for that too. But we’ve got to move fast. Miraba is in the middle of the cataclysm and our entire mission may be in jeopardy. Just see that the damn monster doesn’t wake up and eat another tachyon tube.”

“I hear you, friend.”

Wave quickly began a scan to locate the Kultaki starship. A soft chime let him know when he was zeroed in and he immediately hailed the Ambassador with an S.O.S.

The Kultaki starship wasn’t very far away, only a million statons or so. Ambassador Lance, Cobishandra and Anadia were completely naked in the sauna except for Anadia who was wearing a black party mask to hide the deep scratches on her face put there by Boots. They were playfully fondling each other in the hot bath while cheerfully watching the destruction of Miraba on the monitor. Ambassador Lance had just downed another goblet of wine when the distress call came in on the overhead.

“Hello, Mr. Nestingwave. It seems that you’ve caught us here in the alltogether. What’s the problem?” His Excellency gave a quick wink to Anadia who was kissing his clawed toes sticking up out of the water.

“Oh, Your Excellency,” Wave said, “your astral roach is eating our tachyon tubes … we’re all going to die … like the people on Miraba … horrible, horrible. Fabby is almost out of commission and Pheledra is so distraught she’s sitting upstairs in a catatonic state.”

“Oh no,” the Ambassador said in a slightly distressed tone, “I never intended for such a thing to happen. I only wanted to give you a little adrenaline rush. I thought that surely you’d be able to quickly overcome that little challenge … and thank me for offering you the sport of it.”

The Ambassador’s tone changed to friendly warmth. “Wave, we’ll be there right away. Don’t despair. We’ll gladly take you back home. Your mission here is useless now. Just look at all that chaos and destruction. Why, I’d be surprised if anything at all remains on Miraba after this. We ourselves have lost so many good folks. Oh my, their screams are horrible … but … they should have forseen it and gotten out. Too bad. Both our missions are terminated. Once we lose our grip and the people wake up, it’s all over for us. We’ll just have to move on to greener pastures … and you … well, Wave, it may take eons for you to recover your strength after this terrible trauma but I’m sure you’ll be okay.”

Cobishandra, who was licking the Ambassadors leathery ear, almost burst out laughing and the Ambassador gave her a swift kick across her scaly buttocks.

“Oh, thank you Your Excellency, thank you.” Wave said. “We’ll hang on somehow ‘til you arrive. Please hurry.”

The communication ended and simultaneously the Ambassador and his two girl friends roared with hilarity, wildly splashing in the steaming sauna trying to dunk each other. The Ambassador laughed so hard he got a severe pain in his chest.

“Remember your heart condition dear,” said Cobishandra.

He regained his composure and they reclined into the water as before but giggled occasionally.

“I guess they want their cat back,” the Ambassador wheezed between giggles, “one of the best performances I’ve ever seen. Where is that fuzzy ball of meat anyway?”

“He ran away after scratching the hell out of my face,” Anadia said between toe nibbles.

“Well, if anyone sees him, get him back into his glass cage right away.”

With that, Ambassador Lance reached down and slowly slipped off Anadia’s mask exposing the bloody scratches.

“Oh my … darling, I just love you in stripes.”

CONTINUE: 12) Orange Flies

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